Okay people. Some of you don't know me very well. Or maybe you do, I am not one to be shy about my business. HA! deal. But I thought that I should do an inventory before the New Year. What has transpired over the last year of my life, and hand out some well deserved thanks to the people who got me here. So the story begins.
As some of you know, November 2005, I set out on the road with a two year old son and moved us to California. I didn't have much in the way of cash, nor did I take many belongings with me. Previous to this journey, Here is the story.
I was involved in a three-four year relationship with a man who has "poor me" syndrom. (I have a feeling at the time I was similarly afflicted.) I found myself pregnant, and realized that was going to be a burden I would solely carry. After working through the stigma of dealing with being pregnant out of wedlock, (therapy for sure. my parents had a very difficult time with it) Thankfully I had found full time employment during this whole ordeal. Unfortunately, I found myself in a job where I was treated and paid poorly. To be sure, I was pretty low. I was feeling depressed, desparate and desolate. But, I am a strong woman, or maybe just mule stubborn, and kept on smiling in the face of the tests. Just as I had decided to turn things around, by moving in with my best friend, I lost my job. I am not entirely innocent in that transaction. It was a blessing in disguise. I could have gone after them, but I was so happy to be out of there. They were/are bouncing paychecks, making shady deals and treating some of their employees awfully. And, they cost me 2200 of my savings investment with them by not paying the premiums to the savings house. You can see how I might have had some subconcious desire to run from that place like it was on fire.
I was at a crossroads. A few weeks before my job loss, a girlfriend of mine was talking about moving back to California. I had joked with her about coming along. She said to me, "You are wasting your talents here! You should quit and come along." The previous two years had lead me to California three times for various events. I attended my sister's wedding, went to a great party in Pasadena, and also a family reunion. During the months after my last visit to California, I had moved in with my friend, liquidating my furniture, and belongings, to save money. And after falling in love with its terrain and weather, I mindlessly thought about it. No real intent in place. But, with this sudden freedom, I thought, why don't I move!? The intent was set in motion. And the universe couldn't have been more compliant.
Here are a few of the details:
I had two cats. What was I going to do about them? Where would I leave them? A friend from work was going to the pound to pick out a couple of cats for her husband and her son. They have a much better home life now than we had.
Where was I going to stay while I found a home? My sister was on her honeymoon in Italy, I got to stay rent free in Napa for a month. Sistah! thanks for having faith in me, and being a most generous auntie. And John, for laughing at us instead of being annoyed.
Where Am I going to spend Thanksgiving? with a new cyber friend
Jason. Thanks to him, his
BBSOW, and her sweet intelligent family, I had a great meal, and great company! thanks bro!
Where would I stay along the way? I had a friend in LA that let me stay with him a few days. Thanks B. I have a good friend in Santa Barbara! She offered to take me to a few places to look. And to stay with her for a week. You will always be my Santa B. sis Lexi!
What am I going to do until I find an apartment? My uber-cool aunt in Carmel let me crash her guest house for two weeks. Barb... without your generosity, I would have been lost.
So, off I went. Less than 1000 in my pocket. No home. No job. And a two year old. Amazingly, I felt the best I had in a long time.
So I landed in LA. Drove to SB. As soon as I crossed that line, my body relaxed like it hadn't in five years or more. I knew I was at home. I should have found an apartment that day! But instead I took some freelance work, and traveled the state a little. Finally got a paycheck from an old freelance job owed me for about a year. And with the help of my most generous benefactor, My wonderful Father, I am here. Moved in on Dec. 16th, to apartment #16, and the third 16 to that equation? My sons birthday is a 16. It cinched the deal for my soul and my concious. I knew we were fated to be here. The first six months were more stressful than pregnancy. Not working, living hand to mouth, pacing the streets looking for any kind of work that would allow us to stay. I was rewarded six months later with a permanent job with the company my father works with. That day I had two other job offers as well, including an interview for a job paying just a bit less than I am making!
Its far from over, but without these special people, including my son, well, I don't like to think about where we would be. Fate has lead me to this moment. I took all its hints and offerings hitching the Nissan to a star! We landed in paradise.
More to come about the six months and the happenings that followed. But for now, even living in a tiny apartment in California, we are happy, blissful, and moving forward with creating a new life. Deep sigh of content.
I just don't fit in. Wait. Isn't that most days? And after trying to relate to a small portion of the planet, I feel like never opening my mouth again. Desiring to just let my images speak for themselves is enough. Thing is, I can't. I hate communication, but for some reason, I am designed to expound. I wish I was more eloquent, but life is as it is. And I keep refining.
