I have been spending months educating myself on the process, dealings, learning, skill sets, etc. As a result, my feeds are filled with auto-generating ads. Learn this, grow here, don't get left behind! I have been excited and put in hours of class time across various platforms, and coaching fields. This week finally getting my question full front, "What do I really want to do?" draw.. relax... draw more... write poetry, inspire people, and feel a part of a team.
There is a real sense of achievement when you know you are going to have others to be there growing with you. Doing things alone is great, but when you have goals or deadlines, and a team around you to share the whines, woes, and wins, that makes it so much more alive.
What team am I a part of? I have multiple clients that are friends, and clients that aren't on a personal level. The nice thing about personal clients, you are feeding your community. They feed you and you feed them back. But sometimes it gets stagnant and you can't be the voice they need you to be when decision times come around. This is where I am trying to branch out.
My years of experience have brought me through so many different clientele, that I feel I'm ready for almost any client's needs. But do I present that with confidence? What holds me back? Why am I waiting until the last minute to be brave? Or until things seem like I am not forceful enough to complete the tasks?
Me. That's what! How is it that I am not screaming my skillset in a larger setting? This pattern isn't about failure. This pattern is about self-awareness and thinking I need to 'fit the mold' of what the others may be offering. COVID life has left me feeling isolated, and all my contacts are online. Which is great, but it's only half of the needs. And living with a child that is completely self-isolating is a rough bit too.
This week I have felt the pressure of this pandemic lifestyle, thinking, I seem to keep running but not getting to the finish line. I feel like I am distracting myself with this lack of clarity, and putting off the work of combining and writing out my plan. Learning is amazing, and it's necessary. But action is energy and moves things forward.
I just joined a womens group to help me find some words and feelings around fixing and aligning what I want! The encouragement of the day? Dare to be yourself. Dare to put it out there. Dare to be seen for what you can do. Dare to brave out the unknown. Dare to trust. Dare to live outside of what is seen. Dare to run with a larger more experienced crowd.
Down to the wire? Yes I feel this is the day when I can bring this experience to people in a voice that is unique to me, and also, helps others see their products, or visions in a way thats unique for them.
But since its Friday? Maybe I will use my newly acquired pens and markers to draw out my plans. Visually.
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